#10 - Tips for Being Present

"Of course, I want to grow my career, BUT I also want a baby soon, so I think I should just stay put, where it's easy and I know what to expect."

This is an exact quote from one of my clients and trust me I get it.  I've been there... hell I'm back here right now!  We are starting to think about baby #2 (and if it's anything like last time, it'll be a long journey before I share any news) but just the idea of it has alarms going off in my head.  

How will growing our family impact my career?  Can I handle it all?  What if it's just too much?  Why should I try to change things?

As women, we are ALWAYS considering the future and the people around us as we make decisions. Whether it's the idea of becoming of mom or putting our partner's career first or caring for family members, we are missing out on opportunities that will help us achieve our own goals and make us happier and thereby better wives, mothers, friends, sisters, etc.

It's easy to put others first and put our own career goals on hold for what MIGHT happen.  But what if we said yes?  What if we made that move?  Invested in our own growth?  Took that new job?  Fought for that promotion?  What if we focused on own career goals and stopped worrying about what our future lives might look like? 

What if you made the priority YOU?

It is possible.  

I'm living proof!  I became a mom, got promoted to SVP (while on maternity leave no less!), went back to work, started a side hustle, worked nights and weekends to grow that side hustle into a full-time gig, quit my corporate life and came out on the other side of it all before my daughter turned one!  Was it crazy?  Yes!  Did I make sacrifices? Of course! But was it possible?  Yes!  Most importantly was it worth it?  HELL YES!  

How did I do it?  I stopped making excuses and hiding behind what MIGHT happen in my personal life, and instead, I focused on being present and taking action!


  • KNOW WHAT YOU WANT: If you think about your career a year from now, where do you want to be?  Get specific! It's impossible to reach your goals if you don't know what they are!  Do you want a promotion?  Are you looking to make a transition in careers or find a new job?  Do you want more flexibility?  The ability to pursue a career that really makes in impact?  You need to know exactly what you are working towards.
  • IDENTIFY NON-NEGOTIABLES: Reaching any goal require focus, hard work and often times more of your time.  What are you willing to shift to allow you to reach your goal?  And what aren't you willing to negotiate?  When I was working full time and building my business I often worked at night after bedtime and I would take clients in the evenings and weekend mornings.  Yes, I had to make some shifts to accommodate this BUT I wouldn't let it take over and so for me, I blocked family time from 12-7pm every Saturday and Sunday.  Didn't matter what we were doing but the three of us did it together!  Now I've shifted further and very rarely work on weekends.  That is my family time and it's so important to me! 
  • ASK FOR HELP:  You just have to!  Whether it is reaching out to a mentor or leaning on your partner more, you need support!  Any time you make a big adjustment or commit to working towards a goal, there are roadblocks.  What do you need to support you to get to your goal?  Is it taking a class in the evenings?  Is it a mentor at work or a coach, that can help you position yourself for that promotion?  Is it more time away from your family, that requires hiring a sitter or relying on your partner to fill in?  Whatever it is SPEAK UP!  Support is necessary and part of life!  We are not meant to do everything on our own.  It truly takes a village, so find your tribe!



Mary Beth Ferrante